Alright, listen up, lead foots and Sunday drivers alike. It's raining. Again. And unless you've recently sprouted gills or your car is amphibious (in which case, please send pics), you're gonna have to navigate this liquid apocalypse like the rest of us mere mortals. So, ditch the daydreaming about that tropical vacation and pay attention, because hydroplaning isn't a personality trait, and ending up in a ditch is a terrible way to spend a Tuesday. Remember, safe driving keeps you from injury and doesn't give your insurance rates another reason to go up.
1. Slow Your Roll
(Like, Seriously, Chill): This isn't a Fast & Furious movie, Vin Diesel isn't waiting for you at the finish line, and your pizza will still be lukewarm even if you arrive five minutes later (tip: even warmer if you turned on your heated seats). The faster you go, the more likely you are to become intimately acquainted with a guardrail. Think of it this way: slow and steady wins the race... and avoids the tow truck.
2. Lights On
(Even if it's Not "Dark"): Yes, Captain Obvious, it's the law. But beyond that, it makes you less likely to be mistaken for a rogue wave by other drivers. Plus, it gives you that cool, mysterious vibe. You know, the kind that says, "I'm a responsible adult who also happens to be an awe-inspiring driver."
3. Check Your Tires
(Are They Bald? You're Gonna Have a Bad Time): Think of your tires as the shoes of your car. Would you wear flip-flops to climb Mount Everest? No. (Unless you're insane. And also, please send pics.) Check your tread depth. If your tires are balder than a cue ball, you're basically driving on ice, even if it's 70 degrees out.
4. Double the Following Distance
(Seriously, Double It): Tailgating is a bad idea on a sunny day. In the rain? It's a recipe for disaster. Give the car in front of you enough space so you have time to react if they suddenly decide to audition for "America's Next Top Emergency Brake."
5. Avoid Cruise Control
(Unless You Want to Lose Control): Cruise control is great for long, straight highways. Rainy, slippery roads? Not so much. You want to be in full control of your vehicle, not letting some robot make decisions for you when things get dicey.
6. Brake Gently
(Don't Slam On the Brakes Like You're Trying to Stop a Runaway Train): Slamming on the brakes in the rain is a surefire way to initiate a spin cycle that would make your washing machine jealous. Apply the brakes smoothly and gradually. Think of it as a delicate dance with your car, not a wrestling match.
7. Steer Smoothly
(No Jerking Allowed): Just like braking, steering should be a gentle art. Jerky movements are more likely to cause your car to lose traction and send you sliding sideways. Imagine you're carrying a tray of hot coffee. Smooth and steady wins the day (and prevents third-degree burns).
8. Be Wary of Puddles
(They Could Be Deeper Than You Think): Puddles can hide all sorts of dangers: potholes and debris. Avoid them if you can. If you can't, drive through them slowly and steadily. And for the love of all that is holy, don't try to splash pedestrians. Karma is a real thing.
9. Visibility is Key
(Wipers On, Fog Lights If Needed): Make sure your wipers are in good working order. If they're streaking or squeaking, replace them. They're cheap, and they make a world of difference. Most auto parts stores will install them free of charge if purchased in their store. And if visibility is really bad, use your fog lights (but remember to turn them off when the fog clears, or you'll blind oncoming drivers).
10. Stay Calm
(Panic is Your Enemy): If you do start to hydroplane, don't panic. Take your foot off the gas, steer gently in the direction you want to go, and avoid slamming on the brakes. Remember, smooth and steady. Think of it as a test of your driving skills. You got this. (Probably.)
So, there you have it. Ten tips to help you survive the next downpour. Now go forth and conquer the roads, my friends. And try not to wreck.